TotalDrama Pornography Story: Misunderstandings – Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Eyes closed, hearts open

I didnt say anything. I couldnt say anything. What did they mean I was blind? I sat up in my bed and put my hand in front of my face. All I saw was blackness. I waved my hand around and began to panic. It was true, I really was blind. I couldnt see anything at all. I reached my hand out to the right and felt some one grab it. It was Bridgette. I some how recognized the feel of her hand from the first time we shook hands on the day we came to this cursed island.

What does it look like? I whispered.

Bridgette took a deep shaky breath. I-Im not really sure your eyes are just so pale and bright. Like a white blue kind of color. I could feel her trembling.

What happened? I can barely remember anything.

Allow me to explain, Chris said. He quickly told me everything about how he had comforted me when I ran away from Duncan, and how I hurt my head so badly I went blind. I could feel the tears gathering in my eyes by the time he finished. I let go of my friends hand and used it to wipe away the unshed tears before they fell.

Is the blindness permanent? I asked.

Its unpredictable. If you got some eye surgery than maybe

Where is Duncan? I asked, my voice shaking. Not with sadness, but with anger.

Dont worry. We got him locked up somewhere.

I want him to see what he has done to me. I want him to know he has ruined my life.

No way Court. You just woke up from a three day coma, you need to rest. Chris said as he pushed me back to lie down again. I opened my mouth to argue when Bridgette cut me off.

Its ok Chris. Gwen and I will take her to him. I think she deserves to talk to him. She said.

Im pretty curious about what hell say to. Gwen mumbled darkly from somewhere on the other side of me.

Fine. Go. Chris huffed in defeat. I cracked a tiny smile and slid off the bed. The moment I did someone put their hand on my shoulder causing me to flinch.

Chill, its just Bridgette. Just follow my touch ok? she said gently. I nodded once and she carefully led me out of the tent and into the campgrounds. Someone else put their hand on my other shoulder and I assumed it was Gwen.

Hey! Im coming to. someone called from behind us. I turned my head around out of habit and heard someones hurried footsteps run up behind me.

Heather? Bridgette said wearily. I cocked an eyebrow in confusion.

Why do you want to come? Gwen sneered.

I just want to see how Duncan reacts to Courtneys condition. She answered firmly.

Yeah right. Actually Heather has been feeling pretty guilty since the accident. Bridgette whispered. My eyes widened in astonishment. Or at least, I think they did. I wasnt even sure if someone could still do that even if they were blind.

Seriously? Heather? Guilty? Did she hit her head to? I asked.

No. She felt guilty I think because she sent Duncan after you a while after you left.

What?

It was pretty amazing. She surprised everyone when she did nothing but mope for the days you were asleep along with Chris. Its a miracle those two actually felt anything for someone who wasnt themselves. Gwen answered.

Well she can come. I dont really care. I finally answered turning my head back around to stare strait forward. They paused for a minute for one reason or another before we started to slowly make our way back to camp. Hey, where is Chris? Is he coming to? I asked after a minute or two of silent walking.

Oh yeah. Hes following but hes a few steps behind us. Heather answered from somewhere in front of me.

He never left your side you know. Chef had a different person bring him food each day because he wouldnt leave you. Bridgette added.

I feel so bad for making you all worry. I sighed.

Dont worry about it. We knew you would be ok. We just didnt know you would Bridgette trailed off.

Go blind? I finished her sentence for her. Her breathed hitched in her throat and I assume she nodded since she didnt answer. So was everyone at the medical tents?

No. DJ and Geoff are guarding Duncan. They are going to find out what happened along with Duncan, because here we are. Heather stopped me from going any further. I reached forward and felt the doorknob.

Are you sure you are ready to face him? Bridgette asked worriedly. I closed my eyes, nodded once, and opened the door. Heather brushed my left arm and Gwen brushed my right arm, guiding me to face the boys. Bridgette shut the door and as she did I heard all three of them yell Courtney! Your ok!

I smiled sadly and shook my head, my eyes still closed. Not completely, I said to them.

What do you mean? You look fine to me. DJ said happily. It was at that moment I decided to open my eyes. And once I did I heard two people gasp.

Oh my god! What happened to your eyes? Geoff asked.

Why? Whats wrong with her eyes? I heard Duncan ask frantically. Apparently he couldnt see my eyes from where I was standing. So, I turned my head in the general direction of his voice and heard a loud crash making me flinch. Oh my god Courtney, what happened? he asked in amazement.

I wanted you to see this most of all, Duncan. I wanted to show you what you did to me. I answered with a glare.

I I did this to you? How? he asked. I nodded.

When you threw me at that rock you made me blind. I wanted you to get a good long look at me before they hauled you off. I wanted you to live with the guilt that you did this to me, that you made me blind, that you ruined my life. I wanted you to know. With out another word I turned around and let my friends guide me out of the cell.

I woke up the day after confronting Duncan to more blackness and sighed. I carefully felt my way out of my bunk and towards the door to my cabin. As I came out I heard footsteps running towards me. Courtney! What are you doing up? You could get hurt if you walk around by your self. I frowned as Heather mentioned my blindness. Every one thought I was so helpless now. I was so used to doing things on my own and wasnt used to being helped all the time.

I got hungry, I said to Heather. She had become something like my personal guardian much to everyones pure amazement including mine. Wherever I wanted to go she took me there and helped me out with things I couldnt do without sight. Who knew Heather actually cared? It was a week for surprises I guess. Heather and Chris caring in the same day. Heather was constantly worrying over me and sometimes I felt so childish when she was around, but it was quickly over come by thankfulness and gratitude. Heather had become one of my best friends, she and Gwen had even moved into my cabin incase I ever needed something. I smiled and felt tears well up in my eyes when I realized what good friends they were, all ways ready to help when I needed it.

Oh Im sorry! Heather said frantically when she reached me. I know how much you hate people talking about your blindness. Please dont cry Courtney. I shook my head at her.

Its not that. Im just happy I have such wonderful friends like you. Who knew you would end up being like a sister to me? I imagined Heather smiling back at me, or smirking at least as she tried to keep up her queen bee image.

Thanks. Oh I all most forgot, Chris said hes going to try to get things back to normal around here. I flinched at the mention of Chris. I still didnt know where he stood in my life. He had been very caring and gentle on the day of the incident, and every now and then he would pop up and check on me. Also every time I heard his name I thought of Duncan. I still didnt know if I cared for him or not. I could never forgive him for what he did to me, but deep down I thought I still felt something for him. Heather didnt notice and continued saying, he said we would have a challenge today, something about swimming. Gwen asked about you and if you could compete. You should have seen his face, it was so sad and worried but he said you could compete if you wanted to. And if you thought you could of coarse

Well I guess Ill think about it. In the mean time can you take me to the mess hall?

Sure Court. Heather answered as she took my wrist and led me down the steps towards the mess hall. I followed silently, my mind racing. ‘Am I really ready for a challenge? Could I even do it because of my blindness? What if we lost and my team voted me off because I was no help any more? I am just a waste of space now anyways.’ We reached the mess hall soon and everyone greeted us as we walked in. All their voices came from one place and I imagined both teams sitting at one table talking happily and enjoying each others company. Bridgette had said something about the walls that usually separated the Bass and the Gofers being torn down after the accident. I smiled and took a seat in between Gwen and Bridgette as Heather sat down across from us.

Im guessing Heather told you about what Chris said? Gwen asked shoving a plate of food in front of me. I nodded and tried to identify what was on my plate. The same things that had been there on the day of the accident. I dug in happily listening to the conversations of others. I noticed Geoff and DJs voices among them.

Are DJ and Geoff here? I asked even though I knew the answer.

Yeah. Chef and Chris are guarding Duncan so Geoff and DJ could eat. Bridgette answered. I flinched again and the mention of Chris. Bridgette noticed since her arm was touching mine.

Whats wrong? She asked. I thought it over one last time before answering.

I need to talk to Chris. Now. I felt her tense beside me. ‘I wonder what she thinks Im going to see Chris for.’ Heather stood from her seat and walked around the table resting her hand on my shoulder. I stood up and heard Bridgette and Gwen get up behind me. I didnt say anything, just followed Heathers touch out the door and across the campgrounds. Once we got to the place Duncan was being held Bridgette poked her head through the door and called,

Chris, Courtney is here and she wants to talk to you. I heard him stand up from inside the room and walk out to where we were standing. Once he came out I flicked my head to the side signaling for the others to leave. They got the message and reluctantly left me alone with Chris.

Hey Courtney. How are you? he asked once the others were out of earshot.

Im doing ok, thanks. I answered.

Thats good. Im glad youre doing ok since the accident. he said as he reached out and took my hand giving it a squeeze. I squeezed his hand back and smiled.

Theres something important I have to say. I said frowning suddenly.

Me to, but you go first.

Ok. I have been doing a lot of thinking and well I think I should leave the island. I pictured him in my mind. His eyes widened and his mouth dropped.

What? Why would you do that?

Im just a burden to my team now and a burden to you. Im worthless now and I cant do anything because of my worthless eyes worthless. I repeated in a whisper. Chris let go of my hand and put both of his on my shoulders.

Dont you ever say that again Courtney. You will never be worthless, weather your blind or deaf it doesnt matter. Your very special and unique, Duncan was a fool to let someone as precious as you get hurt. I felt tears sting my eyes once more at Chris kind words. He pulled me in closer and wrapped his arms around me. I hugged him back and cried silently into his chest, just as I did the day of the incident six days ago. He stroked my hair and rested his head on mine. After a few minutes in that position I looked up at Chris and asked,

When will Duncan be leaving? Chris paused for a moment before replying.

His parole officer is running late. Instead of tomorrow he will leave in another week or so sorry.

Its fine as long as he doesnt come near me. I said narrowing my eyes. It wont matter anyways. Im still going to leave the island. Then my friends wont have to worry about me all the time they can focus on winning once Im gone, and you can focus on running the show like a great host does. Chris wiped away my tears with his gentle hands.

It would be even harder to focus with you gone. You mean a lot to me you know? I smiled and laughed a bit.

I thought your hair was everything to you. He laughed along with me.

If only you could see my hair right now. I havent really been taking care of it because Ive been to worried about you. I stopped laughing and got serious again.

Im sorry Chris, but this is what I have decided. When will a boat be ready for me?

Right now. There is one at the docks all set up for us.

Us?

Yes. This is what I was going to tell you. I have a surprise for you on the main land. We should go now actually.

Now? As in right now?

Yes. That is, if your ready. I thought a moment, and then nodded. All right. Your things are all ready on the boat. Just give me a sec. With that said he went back inside shutting the door behind him

Chef! he called quietly. Chef stood from his chair that was facing Duncan, who was throwing a ball up in the air and catching it. Courtney and I are leaving now. We ought to be back in like three days so I trust you can handle things on your own? Chef saluted him while Duncan lost focus when he heard Courtneys name and dropped the ball on his head.

What do you mean? Duncan asked. Where are you and Courtney going? Chris glanced at Duncan but continued to talk to Chef.

So like I said, we should be back in a few days. I left a list of some challenges I thought of in my trailer. And keep him under control. He said tilting his head to Duncan who had stood up and was gripping the bars.

Where are you two going?! Answer me! he shouted. Chef nodded.

What do I say to the others when they notice youre gone? Chris thought for a moment.

Youre a smart guy, to some extent, Im sure you can come up with an excuse. See you in a few days!

Wait! Duncan called, but Chris was all ready out the door. He banged his head on the bars in front of him. ‘Will she ever forgive me?’

I waited for Chris to come out from the jail cell room when I heard Duncan shouting. Where are you and Courtney going? Answer me! he shouted. But soon Chris was standing beside me again.

Ready to go? he asked grabbing my hand.

Ready. He led me towards the dock as Duncans words echoed in my ears. ‘Maybe he really was sorry. Maybe I should give him another chance.’ I shook my head forcibly. ‘No. I will never forgive him for what he did to me. Never. Whos to say he wont do something worse if I give him the chance?’ As Chris helped me onto the boat I realized something. I forgot so say goodbye to the others! They have no idea Im leaving. I turned around to get off the boat when my foot caught on some fishing net and I tripped. Chris caught me just in time and helped me regain my balance.

No time, he said as the boat began to move. I stared strait forward sadly. ‘I wish I could have said good-bye to them. Ill probably never see them again.’ Just then I heard something in the distance. Chris gently grabbed my shoulders and turned me so I faced the noise. Then he bent down and whispered in my ear. The whole camp is on the dock waving good bye, he whispered. I could hear what they were saying now. Goodbye Courtney! Take care! See you soon! they all shouted. I smiled happily and put my head on Chris shoulder. He put his arm around my waist and I stood like that listening and waving as their voices faded into the distance. Once they were completely gone I stretched and yawned. I was surprised at how tired I felt since I had just woken up a few hours ago. ‘I was up pretty late last night, thinking.’

You ought to get some sleep, he said to me. Its a long ride to the mainland. I nodded and let Chris guide me down into the bottom of the boat where there was a small room waiting for me. I lay down and whispered, Goodnight Chris, before falling asleep.

Chris smiled down at Courtney and brushed her bangs out of her face. ‘She looks so peaceful just lying there.’ He thought. Goodnight Courtney.

This chapter made me… squirm. I don’t really know how to describe it. When I was writing it just made me squirm a lot. I took me a while to plan it out and a little longer to type it up. Anyways here it is, chapter 4. I’m terrible at nameing things… Anyvays I vant to take a quick moment to thank those of you who have reviewed my story so far. It’s you guys that keep me motivated to finish this! I especially want to thank Amethyst Ocean for that helpfull bit of constructive critisism. It really made me try my best with this chapter, unfortunetly it’s still not that good. T_T I know the charactors are extremely OOC but that’s kind of the point. Guess I forgot to mention that? Hehe… my bad. ^_^ Thanks to all of you again who have reviewed or faved this story.